Breaking Bad...for Cheese Dip

M

marilynfl

Moderator
Last week I scored my first drug deal. Well...technically it wasn't a drug deal. Technically..there weren't any drugs involved at all. To quote Wiki, drugs imply "a substance that has a physiological effect when ingested or otherwise introduced into the body." In my world, that's the definition of chocolate.

In a non-darkened, non-backstreet, non-ghetto, non-alley, there was a mutually beneficial exchange of chemicals for cookies. I bartered a batch of "Hazelnuts Raised to the Fourth Power Cookies" for an ounce of Trisodium Citrate, a derivative of citric acid >> Street Name: Sodium Citrate.

Go ahead. Arrest me.

http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g166/Finer_Kitchens/Marilyns%20Minutia/TrisodiumCitrate_zps4ccb7d60.jpg

Sodium citrate is currently popular in molecular gastromony circles to spherify pureed food. Mine was used to make a lovely melty cheese dip...something like creamy Velveeta dip, but without every other chemical in the Periodic Table.

KRAFT Velvetta Pasteurized Process Cheese Spread:

Ingredients:

NONFAT MILK AND MILKFAT, WHEY, MILK PROTEIN CONCENTRATE, MILK, SODIUM PHOSPHATE, MALTODEXTRIN, CONTAINS LESS THAN 2% OF SALT, WHEY PROTEIN CONCENTRATE, CALCIUM PHOSPHATE, LACTIC ACID, SORBIC ACID AS A PRESERVATIVE, SODIUM ALGINATE, CITRIC ACID, SODIUM CITRATE, CHEESE CULTURE, ENZYMES, APOCAROTENAL AND ANNATTO (COLOR).

Yum.

**Gooey, Melty REAL Cheese Dip**

3 Cups of grated cheese

1/4 C beer

7 grams of sodium citrate (1/4 ounce, ~ 1.5 tsp)

(that's it!)

http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g166/Finer_Kitchens/Marilyns%20Minutia/014_zpsd9341cc0.jpg

DO NOT USE pre-grated cheese as it has "other" stuff added to it. I used 2 cups of grated Cabot Sharp Cheddar and 1 Cup of Pepperjack Cheese.

Warm beer and dissolve sodium citrate.

Add grated cheese and stir to melt.

Use a stick blender to emulsify.

Dip will reharden fairly quickly, so a water bath is recommended if you want to keep the cheese fluid for any length of time.

http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g166/Finer_Kitchens/Marilyns%20Minutia/009_zps4b765308.jpg

It took longer to grate the cheese than to melt it. As it cools, the dip will reharden into a solid mass. I simply added a bit of water and zapped it in the microwave to thin it out again.

 
An old, old post showing my constant search for the perfect cheese dip

Chile Con Queso (aka “Cheese Dip with a Sinful Zip”)

In Albuquerque, New Mexico a local phenomenon occurs in every Mexican restaurant: within 10 seconds of being seated, a bowl of salsa and a basket of warm chips magically appear on the table. However, a bit more cash brings a bowl of hot, gooey chile con queso in all its lovely meltiness. It became a weekly addiction and eventually, I became One with queso.

When we moved to Florida, my craving for cheese queso returned with a vengeance and I began testing recipes trying to reproduce the texture & taste. A variety of cheeses were used—imported, expensive, pure—as I searched for the right consistency. Lots of test, lots of rouxs, and lots of calories were consumed, yet none matched my favorite from New Mexico.

Then I stumbled upon a cookbook from a New York City restaurant specializing in chile. Within those hallowed pages, the author, God bless his soul, admitted that some of us are just Velveeta fools. There it was—in print! With clarity, I realized I had been going down the wrong path of enlightenment. No need for handmade boutique cheeses. No imported rounds for me. Turns out that the bright orange boxed processed stuff was the key!

I had to stand up and admit, "Hello, my name is Marilyn and I'm a Velveeta-holic."

Sauté until soft:
1 finely chopped onion
2 finely chopped jalapeno, seeds and veins removed (the more >> the zippier)
2 TBL olive oil

Add and simmer until liquid evaporates:
1/2 large can diced tomatoes, drained
1 small can green chili, diced (I prefer the whole ones to the canned diced or chopped versions)
1/2 tsp ground cumin

Add:
8 oz Velveeta cheese, cubed
1 can Campbell's cheddar soup

Stir until the mixtures reaches critical mass and melts, which should be just this side of chip-dippin’ heaven. Carefully hide it until your guests leave and then munch out while watching old black & white monster movies in your jammies.

Note: For what it's worth, I've tried the “melt-Velveeta-in-salsa” trick and it's close. But this is closer to Nacho Nirvana. Cardiac Arrest Patients take care: do NOT add any salt to this! There's enough here to salinate a small lake. It is the price one must pay for speaking in third person.

 
Please, yes! I have a scale. . .

that can measure grams. Very kind of you to offer!

Do you need my address, or do you still have it?

 
Oooh, I just had a Velveeta grilled cheese (pasteurized cheese product) sammy last night. . .

for dinner. I don't think I have had one for 25 years, really. And it was really good. Velveeta melted into the bread and the sandwich was very dairy-sweet tasting, but savory. Good.

 
First of all, I'm at work reading this and died laughing after seeing your picture

holy cow that is hilarious!!

and the dip looks good too...!

 
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