Tempering chocolate for Sandi in Hawaii...
San, tempered chocolate shouldn't melt in your hands...unless you hold onto it for a long time and then any chocolate will melt from body heat.
I believe the most accurate method is the first one you described. Because of the sugar, chocolate has a crystalline structure. The first higher heating "breaks" the crystal structure apart. But it shouldn't be heated so high that the chocolate burns.
It is then left to "cool down" to ensure all crystals are broken and no stray crystals are lurking....like making candy and having to be careful about undissolved sugar granules.
The next "heat up" takes it to the precise temperature that will dry "tempered." This number depending on the type of chocolate...white, semi, milk, bitter. A smear of tempered chocolate should "snap" when broken, not dry to a bloom, and coat thinly and evenly. However, without a constant heat source, the bowl of melted chocolate will start to cool down and this will change the results. Especially if you're dunking, say, cold Oreo Truffles. You may get some coated with tempered chocolate, but then the mass will get too cold.
Another method is called "seeding". You melt 2/3 of a chunk of chocolate, then "add back in" the "still tempered" chunk, which cools the mass and seeds the crystals to develop into the correct "tempered" structure. No temperatures are used...this goes by feel and experience.
There are tempering machines which automatically cycle through the temperature sequence to melt, cool, reheat, then hold at the correct tempered number. Of course, they cost hundreds of dollars--and are on my "I wish" list.
The "building crystals" logic makes sense to me, especially after sitting through 2 semesters of solid state semiconductor courses. But I've never had the time to just practice and do it the right way. I even have a "chocolate thermometer" which ranges between 40 degrees and 130 degrees to get the exact temperatures. Still haven't mastered it yet. Of course, I am also the one who can't make GayleMO's fudge candy either.
The blow-dryer hint was a good one to keep melted chocolate warm and tempered. I've also read that sitting the bowl of tempered chocolate on a heating pad will help to keep it at the correct temperature for the duration of your work.
http://www.finerkitchens.com/swap/forum1/76630_I_have_a_question_-_does_tempered_chocolate_melt_on_your_hands?