Etiquette Question:

R

richard-in-cincy

Well-known member
I'm having dinner tomorrow in the home of a female Chinese colleague and her family and was planning to take flowers (no white) and jasmine tea from our local Chinese Grocery as host gifts.

Anyone have any other suggestions?

TIA!

 
What thoughtful gifts. My chinese neighbor LOVES chocolate. I do not think you need anything else

i think your current thinking is both thoughtful and generous. BUT, if you were considering an additional item, chocolate would work.

I am excited for you. (I do hope they prepare traditional chinese dishes!) It would be wonderful to not only taste and enjoy the dishes but to also see how they are made.

What a fun night you have scheduled!!

My neighbor has the most beautiful chinese chop sticks, seriously... I was a little uncomfortable using them. They were so pretty and had such a beautiful dish to place them in.

 
My Chinese coworker said any flowers other than white were okay and NO CLOCKS.

So you'll just have to forego that 3-foot pastry rendition of Big Ben that I know you were thinking of doing.

 
Thanks all...yes, this will be traditional Chinese homecooking...

They are from outside of Shanghai. She already knows I'm not typical American and quite adventurous. When she asked about any food no-nos I told her "anything goes, leave the heads on and the eyeballs in." LOL

They have a local hometown dish of spiced pork belly that she's brought for lunch a few times that she's going to make as well as a whole steamed fish and other dishes from her home.

She's very curious about central European cuisine and I will be hosting an Austrian dinner in return.

Can't wait!

 
Why no white flowers? No clocks? Is this a Chinese holiday that I'm not familiar with?

Never heard of these customs before(?).

 
Dawn, Josh told me both are symbolic of death, so it would be rude (thoughtless) to bring that to a

home of your host.

Who knew, huh.

 
Nevermind... of course they have clocks... what was I thinking?!!

Time to stop trying to do 2 things at once here ;o)

 
Dawn, the word for clock sounds similar to the word death in Mandarin.

So it's considered bad luck to give someone a clock as a gift. Watches are okay. The number 4 is also considered bad luck for the same reason as well. So if possible, avoid giving gifts in sets of 4. Otherwise all other even numbers are lucky, and 8 is especially auspicious. Oh, and white flowers are associated with funerals, therefore you try to avoid those in bouquets.

 
Sounds like a wonderful exchange. I'm sure she'll appreciate you researching her culture

and if you goof and bring an inappropriate gift, I'm sure she'll accept it in the spirit it was given.

 
When I was in Japan for a few years, If you gave them a gift they thought they had to give one in re

turn. So something small is ok. I think the tea is a nice idea maybe a small teapot, or a nice spice blend with direction on what to use it for.

 
How nice! Flowers are always welcome. But I'm thinking that jasmine tea is coals to Newcastle.

I bet they would love a food item from your own cultural heritage. Maybe some German cookies?

 
You know, I was thinking of that as well last night, so I now have a nice box of Lebkuchen ready

as well as a beautiful heliotrope and chartreuse bouquest that is SCREAMING SPRING!!!

 
Oh, good. That sounds fabulous and I'm sure they'll like it.

I bet the flowers are lovely. I always love getting flowers--more than chocolate, actually.

 
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