I'm taking a sanity break and thought I should check in and fill you in. this still seems unreal and other times, only too real. Don had a problem with the ulcer and the doc ordered an endoscope on 4/11/08 and he found a tumor in the esophagas. Don had been functioning fine till then. May 5th, 3 wks and 3 days later, he was gone. that was just 3 wks ago yesterday.
my beloved left me a huge mess to straighten out and business that I can't run because I don't have the techincal knowledge. that friday, a friend of ours called to tell me she was on her way to me and hoped it would be OK. she arrived with a suitcase in hand, and I certainly didn't expect that. she is a programer and knows cold fusion. by that Sunday I had a support team forming around me to keep me and the business from going down.
The following monday, a business that normally runs smooth had problems and things Michelle didn't know how to work with. our competition had called me when he found out and said: "anything you need, any help you need, you call me." I called and he sent his tech guy over and Darren spent 3 hrs problem solving and showing Michelle how to access things she didn't know about. had another problem on wednesday and ActionNet sent their tech to our customer and he walked and said: I'm here for Newport Internet. another crisis resolved. friday, we had record setting heat and in this temperate climate, there are no air conditioners. Michelle and I watched as the temperture continued to climb in the server room. if got much higher it would have taken out everything and there would be no recovery. we had made frantic calls to all our friends. just I thought I was about to lose everything a friend of hers pulled up and walked in with an airconditioner.... talk about miracles!
the entire community was shocked by Don's sudden death. even our doctor called as he saw the death notice and couldn't belive it could actually be Don. I have been surrounded by more love and support than I ever knew existed for us/me. it's been difficult for me as I'm usually the one who takes care of others. now, I know the only way I can survive is to gratefully accept all that is being offered to me. So many asked about a ceremony but I can't even begin to wrap my head around that as I have so much on my plate so our Performing Arts Center has offered to put something together there. I have lawyers offering services as I will need that. I have friends by my side and now, friends I didn't know I had. as difficult as this has been, I have so many to thank and so much to be gratefull for.
as for our Michelle, she has become by best friend, my sister, my daughter and most of all, my guardian angel. until I can get the office bldg sold and pay off the business debt, there is no extra money for a salary and that's fine with her. I did give her Don's very expensive camera and lens and I know he would want her to have for all that is doing for me. there are new miracles almost everyday and we both are blown away by everything and everyone that keep falling into place to help me. as difficult as it is to lose Don, almost lose the business and everything else, it has become a time of amazing events and people. you all have been part of that too and I have been deeply touched by your love and support. when I dig out from under, I will thank you personally.
and, dear ones, take care of yourselves and your loved ones. you need to make sure you have all your paperwork, etc in order because you never know how much time you have together. we had nothing in order, including insurance and Don was always going to take care of things in few weeks. I wouldn't wish this on anyone so make sure you've crossed your t's and dotted your i's. take care of the ones you love as it will give them the grace of grieving. always remember how much you love someone and let them know. be slow to anger and quick to forgive. may you always have love in your hearts and the love of family and friends to surround you.
HUGE HUGS to you all.......
my beloved left me a huge mess to straighten out and business that I can't run because I don't have the techincal knowledge. that friday, a friend of ours called to tell me she was on her way to me and hoped it would be OK. she arrived with a suitcase in hand, and I certainly didn't expect that. she is a programer and knows cold fusion. by that Sunday I had a support team forming around me to keep me and the business from going down.
The following monday, a business that normally runs smooth had problems and things Michelle didn't know how to work with. our competition had called me when he found out and said: "anything you need, any help you need, you call me." I called and he sent his tech guy over and Darren spent 3 hrs problem solving and showing Michelle how to access things she didn't know about. had another problem on wednesday and ActionNet sent their tech to our customer and he walked and said: I'm here for Newport Internet. another crisis resolved. friday, we had record setting heat and in this temperate climate, there are no air conditioners. Michelle and I watched as the temperture continued to climb in the server room. if got much higher it would have taken out everything and there would be no recovery. we had made frantic calls to all our friends. just I thought I was about to lose everything a friend of hers pulled up and walked in with an airconditioner.... talk about miracles!
the entire community was shocked by Don's sudden death. even our doctor called as he saw the death notice and couldn't belive it could actually be Don. I have been surrounded by more love and support than I ever knew existed for us/me. it's been difficult for me as I'm usually the one who takes care of others. now, I know the only way I can survive is to gratefully accept all that is being offered to me. So many asked about a ceremony but I can't even begin to wrap my head around that as I have so much on my plate so our Performing Arts Center has offered to put something together there. I have lawyers offering services as I will need that. I have friends by my side and now, friends I didn't know I had. as difficult as this has been, I have so many to thank and so much to be gratefull for.
as for our Michelle, she has become by best friend, my sister, my daughter and most of all, my guardian angel. until I can get the office bldg sold and pay off the business debt, there is no extra money for a salary and that's fine with her. I did give her Don's very expensive camera and lens and I know he would want her to have for all that is doing for me. there are new miracles almost everyday and we both are blown away by everything and everyone that keep falling into place to help me. as difficult as it is to lose Don, almost lose the business and everything else, it has become a time of amazing events and people. you all have been part of that too and I have been deeply touched by your love and support. when I dig out from under, I will thank you personally.
and, dear ones, take care of yourselves and your loved ones. you need to make sure you have all your paperwork, etc in order because you never know how much time you have together. we had nothing in order, including insurance and Don was always going to take care of things in few weeks. I wouldn't wish this on anyone so make sure you've crossed your t's and dotted your i's. take care of the ones you love as it will give them the grace of grieving. always remember how much you love someone and let them know. be slow to anger and quick to forgive. may you always have love in your hearts and the love of family and friends to surround you.
HUGE HUGS to you all.......
