They lied Chocolate Pudding

[marilynfl]

First, you need to get some of that radio-active tape and cordon off the kitchen because--by the time you're done--it will end up looking like a dirty bomb went off.

http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g166/Finer_Kitchens/un-radioactive_warning_sign.jpg

Then you'll need to locate an eyewash station because you'll require one after the tapioca flour sprays up into your eyes, even though the blender top was on.

http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g166/Finer_Kitchens/eyewash.jpg

Then you'll need to bandage your hand like this:

http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g166/Finer_Kitchens/burnthand.jpg

after you burn it with the scalded milk that overflowed ALL OVER THE GLASSTOP STOVE

http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g166/Finer_Kitchens/extremely_durable_glass_top_square_200.jpg

which happened while you were WIPING THE TAPIOCA PARTICLES OUT OF YOUR EYES.

Then you will spill the remaining hot scalding milk all over the blender.

Then you will swear yet again as hot, scalding egg/milk mixture foams up and out of the blender lid and swear EVEN LOUDER as you push down on the lid and accidentally push the center cap down into the churning lava mixture.

Then you will CURSE THE AUTHORS of this recipe and wonder what size blender they have because you STILL have to add 12 oz of chocolate and you're ALREADY at the top of the blender.

Then you will pour half of the mix back into the burnt, scalded pot and melt the 12 oz of chocolate in the remaining hot milk and you will get the truly uncomfortable feeling that something is rotten in Denmark because your pudding is not looking like "thick mayonnaise" as the recipe claims so much as it is looking like foamy chocolate milk.

Then you dredge up whatever swear words you haven't used yet and sip the damn thing as a cup of hot cocoa while pretending that this all wasn't in vain because you aren't having the rich, creamy chocolate pudding you were hoping to enjoy.

Then you will dump everything into a bowl and toss it in the frig, where--surprisingly--you will be discover the NEXT DAY that the pudding has tenatively set and you have a soft, creamy pudding.

4 large egg yolks (I used 5)

1/4 C plus 2 TBL tapioca flour

1/2 C plus 2 tsp sugar

1 C heavy cream

2 C whole milk

1 tsp fine sea salt

1 tsp vanilla extract

12 oz 66% dark chocolate, chopped.

Blend yolks and tapioca flour at low speed until light-colored paste.

Heat remaining ingredients (except chocolate) until boiling and add to blender. Tapioca will thicken to thick mayonnaise (they lied!).

With blender running, add chocolate in stages. Strain into 6 bowls and allow to cool to room temp before transferring to frig to chill completely.

From Ideas in Food by Aki Kamozawa and H. Alexander Talbot.

 

[mistral]

But the question is: Did it taste good? (nt) smileys/wink.gif

 

[marilynfl]

Yes. It was very chocolately, very smooth and very creamy. But not very thick. If I had an electric

ice cream maker, it would have morphed into ice cream yesterday because it's basically a french custard base.

I have one of those darn Donvier ice cream makers that have to already have been in the freezer 24 hours before using.

 

[barbara-in-va]

Egads, I read this with a mouthful of lunch, there was no warning sign not to do that! Thx Mar!

 

[angak]

maybe the recipe was just an "idea" they had---like the title of their book. : )

 

[angak]

and thinking it through in their mind, it was a good idea.

 

[erininny]

I love this (though not the injuries you sustained while making the pudding). smileys/wink.gif

 

[florisandy]

God bless you Mar for trying to "follow" directions... Thanks for a good laugh

 

[traca]

Too funny. Marilyn, I bet they tested recipe using a Vita-Mix, which has a 64 ounce capacity.

From what I can tell, the standard models of say, a KitchenAid blender ranges from 48 ounces to the big daddy, clocking in at 54 ounces. Even then, it's still a whole 10 ounces smaller than a Vitamix.