What's new to me....

R

richard-in-cincy

Well-known member
Aunt Barb visited us this weekend and we held a big family dinner at our house in her honor. The menu:

My grandmother's fried chicken (best in the world, forget you pretenders)

Mashed potatoes ( 95-yo Aunt Gee Pronounced them the best ever mashed potatoes--I told her the secret was lots of butter and cream)

Pan Gravy

Chocolate Malt Cake with Toasted Marshmallow filling---(this cake is to die for)

Grandma's green beans with bacon, ham, and onions, cooked into smithereens.

The rest of the family brought in corn muffins, cauliflower soup,etc.

But this. THIS: One of the cousins brought in a little container of fried chicken from Kroger's and that is what she ate.

I could not believe it. She knew I was making my grandmother's fried chicken.

Everyone went on and on and on and on how amazing it was to have real old-fashioned fried chicken as their grandmothers had done it.

Cousin ate her Kroger fried chicken and would not even taste mine.

I am insulted.

Is there any reason why I should not be?

 
No, you have every reason to be insulted. What the heck was she thinking?

I mean, I'm allergic to seafood. One of my friends invites a whole bunch of us to a big seafood dinner once a year. Ranther than NOT being invited (it's such a fun crowd), we have agreed that i'll just bring a plate of sushi. Because she invites a lot pof people and she has drinks, salad, coffee and cake afterwards I've decided to not add the additional burden of cooking for me only because she has so much else to think about. At this party, I bring my "own food", but it's something we have agreed on and she know's I'm doing it and it's for allergic reasons. But from there. to just showing up with KFC? It's like bringing McDonalds to a family Christmas dinner. You just don't do that!

 
Knowing how families are- especially yours- I'd say just roll your eyes and forget it

......all the time saying "more for me!"

 
My (unusually wise) 18-year-old gives this reason not to be insulted.

If the insult was intended, then you'd be giving her what she wants, and that encourages further insults. If the insult was unintended, then she's just ignorant and should be either educated or pitied.

Your menu sounds heavenly! Thank goodness there were other guests there to appreciate it.

 
Does she exhibit irrational behavior in other areas of her life? Could be a mental issue.

Or, it could be that she has dietary issues and has found the one thing she can eat without getting sick. I've met people like that, who only eat two or three things because it doesn't aggravate a dietary intolerance.

Otherwise, all things considered, Junebug's 18-year-old gives darn good counsel!

M

 
I was thinking along the lines of maybe she ate the chicken once and became ill

for some reason, and perhaps blamed it on the chicken thinking you used an ingredient she was allergic to or thought she was. Did she eat the rest of the food or only her purchased chicken? I know what I would do, only because I am wildly curious about why folks do the things they do. Take her aside when you can, or call her, and say how much you enjoyed the fact that she was in attendance, but you noticed she brought purchased chicken and inquire if perhaps she has a dietary issue you should be made aware of for the next party.

 
Sorry, no excuse not to explain the "take-in," food.

I can see everyone's point here about dietary issues etc, but to not discuss with Richard as the host in advance is unfair and rude. Anyone who has hosted a major dinner or family event knows the work and love that goes into the preparation.
It's insulting. Period. Had he known, I'm sure he would have made accommodations for any dietary issues. If you're deemed close enough to be at the table, you're close enough to reveal any concerns.

 
The world gets "curioser and curioser" everyday!

Please forgive me for being amused, but I can just imagine your family sitting at your beautiful, bountiful table, and odd cousin sitting there munching her KFC. I can just see all those eye rolls! After all my years here and reading about your infamous feasts, the incongruity of choosing KFC over your fare just astounds me. How did you manage not to say anything? I commend for your restraint! LOL!

 
I feel exactly the way you do about this, however, some folks just cannot think well

and do questionable things. They should speak up if they have an issue.. Yes, I would have been very upset, as well.
Like Cathy said, move on and forget about it, not worth the high blood pressure!
I was trying to see some reason she may have done what she did, but not knowing her or her past is difficult.

 
I can't imagine any scenario where Kroger fc would be preferable to your

Wonderful family recipe lovingly prepared by you.

Did anyone say anything? If that happened in my extended family, the person would have heard no end of grief for it, in a loving way, of course! smileys/wink.gif

 
Richard, I offered to bring your Russian potatoes to a group dinner and was told they already have

BOGO microwaveable prepared version from the grocery store.

This is a new group of friends who have never had it before, but really? They know not what they miss.

 
Can we look at this another way?

I know a bunch of people who find being in a social situation tough. I'd rather they come, and do whatever is necessary to make themselves comfortable. If they have food issues--whatever they are, and yes, that includes personal preferences, so what? Bring whatever makes you happy and enjoy the party. The goal is being together, yes?

Of course if I made a meal, I'd love for her to try the food, but if that's not her jam, why not respect her wishes? Insisting on trying it, or making her feel bad about not wanting to indulge? Nah. It's her experience. Who am I to dictate how she wants to show up? I'm much more concerned about making her feel welcome, than what she eats.

 
I would be insulted too, and then have to decide if this particular cousin was worth inviting

in the future.

If she is included often, I would share with her that you were taken aback, and ask if there was some reason she needed her own food that day. Maybe there is an issue you can resolve.

If it is only when your Aunt Barb visits, and if that is not that often, then include her and take bets on what she will bring next time. You know you are a brilliant cook without her affirmation.

People don't change much, especially if you are related.

 
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